YOU MIGHT BE IN THE WRONG CHURCH...PART 2
By Reverend Barbara Sexton Dear Ones Healing Ministry January 23, 2010
You might be in the wrong church if...
THE MID-WEEK SOCIAL HIGHLIGHT IS 'STRIP BINGO'
You might be in the wrong church if...
IF AFTER A MONTH OF SUNDAYS YOU START TO WONDER IF YOUR DEODORANT AND MOUTHWASH ARE WORKING BECAUSE NO ONE EVER COMES OVER TO YOU TO EVEN SAY 'HI'
You might be in the wrong church if...
PASTOR SAYS, "THE DEVIL IS JUST A POOR MISUNDERSTOOD SOUL"
You might be in the wrong church if...
PASTOR DELIVERS A SCATHING SERMON RIFT WITH SPECIFICS THAT SOUND SUSPICIOUSLY LIKE WHAT YOU TOLD HIM DURING YOUR LAST COUNSELING SESSION, WHILE POINTING AT YOU AND WITH A REALLY WEIRD LOOK IN HIS EYES.
You might be in the wrong church if...
THE HEAD OF THE HOSPITALITY COMMITTEE IS FAMOUS FOR HER COOKBOOK 'ONE HUNDRED AND ONE EASY WAYS TO INCORPORATE ROAD-KILL INTO THEIR DIETS WITHOUT THEM KNOWING IT'.
You might be in the wrong church if...
THE REQUIRED 'CHURCH UNIFORM' INCLUDES A LOT OF SPANDEX AND 'CUT OUTS' IN THE WRONG PLACES
You might be in the wrong church if...
SEVERAL MEMBERS OF THE STEWARDSHIP COMMITTEE ALWAYS SEEM TO BE WEARING ANKLE MONITORS
You might be in the wrong church if...
PARTICIPATION IS 'BY REFERRAL'ONLY'
You might be in the wrong church if...
IRS AGENTS SEEM TO HANG OUT THERE A LOT
You might be in the wrong church if...
YOU'RE SICK AND TIRED OF ALL THE KOOL-AID AT CHURCH PICNICS
You might be in the wrong church if...
IN THE CHILDREN'S CHRISTMAS PAGEANT THERE IS ONE SHEEP, NO ANGELS AND TWO DOZEN BABY JESUSES.
It's good to laugh and be joyful, even when it hurts. Then healing begins.
With Love,
Reverend Barbara Sexton Dear Ones Healing Ministry
January 23, 2010
No comments:
Post a Comment